Funny comedy of a gentleman

While visiting England, George W. Bush is invited to tea with the Queen.

 In conversation, he asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says she surround herself with intelligent people, which helps her to make wise decisions. 

He asks how she knows if the people around her are intelligent. 

"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen.

"Allow me to demonstrate." She phones Tony Blair and asks, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question:

  Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"

Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am."

"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"

"Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"

Upon returning to Washington, he decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."

"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"

"Umm, so like... your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Helms onders the question for several minutes and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. 

He immediately calls a meeting with the other senior senators and they puzzle over the question for several hours but nobody can come up with an answer. 

Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.

"Now look here Mr. Powell, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother, or your sister. Who is it?

" Colin answers immediately, "It's me of course, you dumb ass."

Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!" 

And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong you dumb ass, It's Tony Blair!"

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Twice as funny comedy lounge (cindy and John) 

Cindy McCain was in her front yard watering her roses when John McCain came out of the house and rushed straight to the mailbox, opened it, looked in,then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. 

As Cindy was getting ready to prune the roses, John came back out to the mailbox, opened it, felt all the way to the back,and then slammed it closed harder than ever. 

Puzzled by her husband's actions Cindy asked him, "Is something wrong honey?"

To which he replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL."

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